Things I'm Still Learning: When to Change a Razorblade

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Fact: I have been shaving my legs for nearly 20 years and still haven't a clue as to when I'm supposed to change out the blade.

Do you change it after every use? Every 4 uses? On a Weekly basis? Perhaps Monthly? And what constitutes as a “use”? Ever since bald became the new playboy bunny, we've all been running around shaving up to our eyebrows like, “Am I sexy now??” And I don't care who you are or what your hair gene-pool looks like, that's a whole-lotta-use.

Clearly this is trivial, but I can't help laughing at the fact that I really don't know. All I do is shave and shave and shave until one day I get out of the shower and realize that my razor didn't do a thing. Or, barely did a thing, and I'm still coated in hair.
Then, I think to myself “I should change the blade.” And then I do something else, like brush my teeth or dry my hair, and forget all about it. Then by the time I get back in the shower to shave at a later date, the cycle just repeats itself.

Of course eventually, I do catch on (thanks, college) but it's not until I've turned that razor into the blade-equivalent of a safety pair of children's scissors, that I give in.

For the sake of research, let's look at the experts of my shaving past, and see what we can gather:

Razor Manufacturer: 

“Best to replace after each use but may be good for up to 5 uses.”

My Mom: 

“These blades are so expensive! Are you sure you want to start shaving? Your leg hair is blonde after all, I don't think anyone will notice.”

My a-hole-puberty-damaged-girlfriends circa age-12:

“______ is so weird, she doesn't even shave!”

“OMG I know, I saw her in shorts during gym class, um, ew.”

“I don't know what I would do without my razor and strawberry scented shaving cream, it's like, my life.”

“Oh yeah, me too. Let's get our Mom's to take us to Fred Meyer this weekend and buy more.”

Clearly I don't have great role models in this department (Sorry, Mom. You're still 50-75% of my fan base though so please don't unfriend me). 

Anyway, I turned out pretty OK. I mean, yes, Some days I have one hairy leg and one bare leg. Other days I have shaved armpits, while the remaining days, my razor breaks halfway through. And then some days I just cut myself, all, over. (ALL OVER, LADIES. CAPS LOCK. ALL. OVER). 

So, like, ouch. 
I guess I'm still learning.

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