Is it Just Me?: Laundry Thievery

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

At my current apartment, I don't have a laundry unit in my home (OH THE HORROR) so instead, I have to carry my loads of laundry down the stairs, over to the building next door, and into the communal laundry room.

Le Sigh. Life is so difficult sometimes.

No but really, it's not a big deal, plus it gets my ass off the couch for at least 4 minutes.

The funny thing though, is that every time I talk about my laundry situation (which, is ostensibly way too often, I'm just now realizing) everyone is all “OH THE HORROR!” and then they're like “what a pain, just sitting there, watching your laundry. You must bring your ipad or a book or something, yes?”

Bring my ipad? Books? Reading??? Listen you, I'm not watching my laundry.
But, “Am I supposed to?”

“Well yes, it seems a bit risky to not.”


“you know, it might get stolen.”

Excuse me, but who, WHO, in the history of public laundering, has been caught stealing other people's shoddy garments?

Of course I've googled it by now, and it actually has happened. But I'm (statistically speaking*) more likely to have a shark crawl out of the sea, Uber to my apartment, and eat me alive while I'm loading the wash, than I am to have these wet, old robes snatched up.

Am I right, or is just just me?

*I made these statisitics up, as are all statistics. Don't act like I'm wrong.

P.S. Shout out to Pervy McPervers who definitely steals laundry, but only when it's dirty. I went to college, I know who you are.

P.S.A. If you live in a large city, maybe keep your eye on your blankets during the cold months. Don't judge me, it's the only time I can think of this whole “laundry stealing” situation coming true. So maybe you can point that finger back at yourself, Ms. “did you bring a book?” 

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