Our New Puppy

This weekend, Eric and I had our most exciting quarantine-adventure, to date. We went and picked up our new puppy, Ruben.

Ruben

I'd like to pause here and note that, over the course of those two sentences, I've had to get up at least ten times to pull numerous objects out of his mouth, and also yank him off of his "Grandma." (Grandma is our 13 year old, Italian Greyhound, Allie, who is basically made of toothpicks and more fragile than your best crystal).

Allie aka Grandma

Anyways, back to our story:

Ruben is an Alaskan Klee Kai, which is a quasi-new breed, first bred in the 1970s they are a mix of Siberian Husky, Alaskan Eskimo Dog, and Schipperke. (For those of you who are close to us, you may recall that our beloved dog Scooter, whom we lost in December, was a Schipperke).

When we were researching Klee Kai's, we watched a number of YouTube videos  from which, I couldn't stop remarking to Eric, how much this breed reminded me of Scooter. From the shape of their legs to their mannerisms, and everything in between. I was like "am I crazy, or is this like, Scooter's cousin?"
And sure enough, we found out that they DO have Schipperke in them, and I am NOT, crazy.

The Schipperke blood certainly wasn't the only reason we chose the breed, but it was a factor for us. We had previously been looking exclusively at Schipperkes, and it just didn't feel right, "replacing" Scooter with a pup that looks like him, but could never actually be him.

Scooter 2019

Scooter was an indescribably, special and beloved dog: Smart, Kind, Loving, and most of all, Eric's best friend. Even though we lost him 5 months ago, the pain of that loss is still palpable. 

For anyone who has ever lost a dog that they loved, like we loved Scooter, I know you understand this pain. And if you have not experienced this kind of love, then you may not understand. And that's okay. I get it. Previous to Scooter, I had loved many animals, but never in the way I loved him. I don't know how to say it other than to say that Scooter was the kind of dog you make movies about. 

The way we lost Scooter was sudden and unexpected (a seizure took his life in a matter of minutes, he was only 7) and the sharp pain of that loss, changed us both individually and as a couple. This isn't to say that things fell apart, but it is to say that it was an abrupt end to a beautiful chapter of our lives. 

When we went to pick up Ruben, I thought that it would be easy. I thought it would be simple. "We're getting a puppy!!!!!" I thought (exclamation marks included), and I was so excited I could hardly sleep Friday night.  But when we arrived on Saturday, I could see Eric holding back tears. 

And in a moment, my throat tightened. A rush of raw emotion was flooding over me, and tears gushed from my eyes. 

I was so in love, and so filled with hope for our future, and also heartbroken, at the same time. 

It was a lot to feel, and neither of us said anything or tried to comfort the other, whatsoever. We were both having the same experience, and all we could do was just, be in it.

As we wiped our tears, Ruben let us know that he didn't have any patience for our sadness. Instead he just dove all over us, chewed on my hair, scratched Eric's face, and like that, we were in the present moment, in love with our new boy.

Dogs are amazing like that. 

Once we got home, we spent the rest of the day playing on the living room floor and trying to come up with a name for our new pup. 

When we went to bed, a few more tears were dropped, and then we passed out, exhausted from the day.

On Sunday, we decided on his name, Ruben. Ruben was a name that Eric had considered naming Scooter years back, so in a way, the name is an homage to Scooter. (Plus, it's really fun to make nick names out of.... Rubes, Ruby, Ruben Sandwich, Ben Ben, Booben... it's truly endless possibilities).

Now, here I am with Ruben, who has found his way to a nap underneath my desk chair. Eric is at work, but will be home early to spend time with our Ruben Sandwich, and life really is good. The sun is shining in, warming my back, Ruben and Allie are audibly breathing as they nap around me, and I'm finishing up a perfect cup of coffee. 

Life is good, and still it shouts, "Scooter is gone." Bringing Ruben home, formally signed off on the chapter that was Scooter and so I suppose, joy and sadness exist together. 

But it's ok.

I believe that Scooter is happy, and I know that his energy still exists, all around us.

I believe that, pain and all, this is how our lives were meant to unfold.

Life gives and life takes away. This is the human experience, and I am grateful for the opportunity.

It's incredible, the full depth of losing a beloved pet. There is so much love, so much emptiness, and then, so much strength and opportunity, that opens up to you, if you seek it. 

So, Dear Ruben, thank you for this opportunity and welcome to your chapter. We have so much love for you and can't wait to watch your life unfold, with us. 

Wishing you good great health,

Lauren